Sunday, May 6, 2012

What have you accomplished today? Feeling very overwhelmed...

I have so much to accomplish and I don't know where to begin or even have the know how on how to accomplish what it is I need to accomplish?
As I finally got to bed last night I reflected on the day and all that I did.  At that moment I felt like I accomplished a lot.  Work, exercised, car oil changed and registered, lawn mowed, kids still alive, 50+ year old wallpaper finally scrapped off and cleaned up, window screens fixed, laundry folded, young women lesson prepared, dishes washed and kids fed, in bed, and still alive!  Exhausting day and even more exhausting being 6 month pregnant but I was able to do it and with the help of a great husband we got a lot done.  But...."BUT" that is the word I hate today.  But today as I walked into the bedroom we are remodeling I realized in the whole scheme of  things that we still have to do to get this room ready to move into I have accomplished nothing....NOTHING.  How discouraging is that.  So as my pregnancy hormones kick in I am now writing this blog crying feeling very overwhelmed with all that needs to be done.  I am crazy, to think I can remodel a bedroom (scrap off wallpaper, mud and tape sheet rock, texture a wall, paint dressers, and paint a room.  I guess I got all geared up and ready to tackle anything since my yard, with the help of my awesome parents, got a major make over done to it.
I know I have help.  It's just lining up our schedule with their schedule and being patient. Rock gets home on Monday and Thursday nights at 9pm between his two jobs, I get home on Tuesday and Wednesdays at 9 pm from my work and work Saturdays until 1pm.  So between Friday night for an hour and a few hours on Saturday we have to concur all we need to plus work on this room. It is not easy to try and do something on my own.  I had to scrap wallpaper out of walk in closet that is not very big.  Seemed like an hour job that took me a week to do.  Literally that wallpaper had been on there for 50+ year and then when I would just get going and in the grove it was lunch time, time to feed the kids, or they got fighting, one got hurt, one had to have their diaper changed, etc.  You see my boys just don't sit and watch a TV show.  They are full of energy and want to be outside and doing something.  So it was 15 min of work here, 15 min there.  Plus this pregnancy has been a lot different then my other two.  My body just isn't cooperating with all that I want to accomplish and I feel very depressed this go around.
So here is to turning 34 tomorrow with lots of work to do.  Really as you get older birthdays just aren't the same as when you were a kid.  I don't want to get older and the day is more of a disappointment of failed expectations of feeling loved and special with the same old work and stuff to do.

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